Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Meditative wisdoms on brass playing

(A fair word of warning: this will be a very silly post, and should not be taken seriously.  It is inspired by a friend of mine and myself, who like to take things to illogical extremes, and make up hidden meanings that cannot be possible.  Now that you have been warned, I will pretend I am dead serious for the remainder of this post.)

Hello fellow brassers.  We are gathered here today so I can enlighten you on one of the most fundamental treatises of brass playing, that so many students overlook.  This short manual contains every necessary fact, hint, and piece of advice that there is to know about orchestral brass playing.

I am talking, of course, about the Pokémon theme song.


This one short text, fittingly set to music, is a many-layered metaphor for some of the fundamental principles of orchestral brass.  Now, for the first time in recorded history, I shall dissect it line by line, and show to the world its secrets to success.  The divine lyrics are in bold, with my explanations underneath.

I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was

Of course, this should be the overall mantra of the orchestral trumpet player.  A true musician does not settle for being "pretty good."  A true musician does not listen to their own sound and say "that's acceptable."  A true musician strives for a perfection that they know they cannot accomplish, and that no one alive has accomplished.   Only when the musician tosses aside acceptance of imperfection, can they begin their journey.

To catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause

The brass player will soon realize the skill set they must possess to hope to achieve the impossible goal, but must be willing to spend tiring hours working to attempt to achieve this.  Their whole being must be focused into the training of these necessary skills, and to never being satisfied with the level they have reached.

I will travel across the land, searching far and wide

The brass player may be tempted to latch into a single regional style, but this will ultimately limit the brass player, whose goal should be to be limitless.  Thus, training in a multitude of regional styles, with different mentors with different backgrounds, is the only way the aspiring brass player will hope to achieve the impossible.

Each Pokémon to understand the power that's inside

A brass player and the player's instrument are partners in a journey.  The brass player must become comfortable with their own instrument, and know how it will respond, and how to make it respond in an ideal way, when its tendencies can and will be less than ideal.

(Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all)
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny

Though the brass player knows their eventual goal of beyond absolute perfection is impossible, the player must convince themselves that, not only is it possible, it is within the realm of the player to accomplish, and is in fact what the player shall accomplish.  This way, the player will not become discouraged at a goal that can never be reached, but shall march fervently towards a goal that they believe they are destined to reach, no matter how unrealistic.

(Pokémon)
Oh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend

The brass player must be totally committed to the art of playing, and any sense of weakness or temptation from the path should be met with resistance.  The fates will seem to draw the brass player away, to less favourable life paths such as non-music, but the brass player must remain strong and fight for the goal the player has set.

(Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all)
A heart so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I teach you
Pokémon
Gotta catch 'em all
Gotta catch 'em all

The brass player will no doubt meet colleagues and rivals in the journey, but the natural arrogance of the brass player will be naught but a hindrance.  The brass player who aims to achieve the goal of unreachable perfection realizes that every individual the player meets can offer insight that will make the path to the goal a little brighter, no matter the age, background, or experience level of the individual.

Every challenge along the way, with courage I have faced

The brass player will no doubt be put in a situation with insurmountable odds, where short-term personal triumph is impossible.  This must not unnerve the brass player, but rather, the player must approach every obstacle as if it is the simplest of tasks, and must at all times show utmost confidence in the player's own abilities.

I will battle every day to claim my rightful place

The brass player may be tempted on their journey to suspend the search for knowledge and skills, but the true brass player realizes that, in hopes of accomplishing the impossible, no straying from the path the player has set out is permissible.

Come with me, the time is right, there's no better team
Arm in arm we'll win the fight, it's always been our dream

Above all, the brass player must realize that any rivalry is merely impeding a friendship.  The brass player must have ultimate faith in the player's section-mates, because in an orchestral setting, only togetherness can produce the desired result of perfection.

(Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all)
It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
(Pokémon)
Oh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend
(Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all)
A heart so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I teach you
Pokémon
Gotta catch 'em all
Gotta catch 'em all
Pokémon

 And so, fellow brassers, take these words to heart.  Every single important notion of brass playing, summed up in three minutes of music.  More beautiful words have never been spoken.  May the Grace of our Lord Arceus, and the Love of his Son Mew, be with you all.


(Also, if you're a Pokémon fan, check out this leaked teaser for Black 2/White 2.  It's pretty intense.
https://s-static.ak.facebook.com/rsrc.php/v1/y2/r/5l8_EVv_jyW.swf?v=10150837632588547&ev=0
Next one will be serious, I promise!)




Saturday, May 12, 2012

What does the scouter say about his power level?

If you don't get that reference, you haven't been following my blog very closely... shame on you!  But anyways, writing because I'm waiting for a potion to brew on Pottermore, and because I have some things I want to blab about, so felt like a good idea.

First off, had the second of two gigs with the local community orchestra tonight, and this night went better than the first, I'd say.  On the program was Schubert's Stabat Mater, Beethoven's Choral Fantasy, and Mozart's Magic Flute overture.  Not in that order.  In, like, that order but backwards.  Didn't really like the Schubert, Beethoven was average but nowhere near the level of his symphonies, and the Mozart's one of my favourite things he wrote (nothing'll ever beat his Symphony 25 for me, but Magic Flute's a good one).


So, here's a weird thing that I've noticed happens to me before orchestra sometimes: every now and then, before a gig or a rehearsal, I'll have a temporary rush of going Super Saiyan.  Like, everything I play will be spot-on, and then some.  During my warm-up before the gig tonight, I did the slow section of the Poulenc trio (first movement) flawlessly, and did a run that ended a third higher than what I tell people is my max capacity on a long horn (played the show on C, as is my usual when I can help it).  It usually only happens before a rehearsal, and even then, it's always before orchestra rehearsals, never band, quintet, or chamber.


I feel like it has something to do with relaxation, and the fact that I'm usually the most at peace in an orchestra setting.  Either way, if only I could harness this power, and use it whenever I want... the power of the Super Saiyan will be mine, I tell you!

Speaking of relaxation... I don't think that's going to happen any time soon.  The music festival is coming up, and... well, here's a story about last year.  I have a notorious history of getting slumps, but by now it's basically just history, and I'll only ever be out for maybe a day, sometimes even only a few hours.  But, when festival rolled around last year, I was off my game for the first week, and a little bit into the second.  I don't know if I ever really gained the respect of the quintet back.  I just really put on a bad show, and this time, I KNOW it can't happen.  I know I'm better than I was last year, even if I hadn't had the slump.  I know that my skills have improved, and that I can pull off the piece we're looking at.  We haven't come to a full conclusion yet, but I'm really hopeful for the Malcolm Arnold.


I know that this time, I have to be on top of my game. I have to be ready, and I'm going to show them.  And, y'know what... I WILL.  It's gonna happen, I'm gonna rock.  I'll unleash maximum capacity, and I won't make a fool of myself for another year.  I swear to Arceus, this year is going to be awesome!


Next time... something so ludicrous, you serious people might as well just skip it and come back the time after. XP

Sunday, May 06, 2012

The Orchestra Rehearsal Drinking Game

Gaaaah Blogger, why'd you change the layout on me? I don't know where everything is now D:
(Editing layout, the blog itself should look the exact same)

So, in the last month or two of rehearsals with the youth orchestra, some of the other members of the orchestra may or may not have noticed certain members of the stage-left brass making odd drinking motions in semi-unison.  I don't remember ever getting odd looks from the other sections, so we seem to have gone unnoticed.  But, I have permission from the creator of this idea (in the trombones) to release a slightly edited and anonymized version (that's a word now because I said so).  All the criteria were her idea, all I did was take out player-specific drinks, and distinguish between sips and shots (it was all the same in the original version).

This is... the Orchestra Rehearsal Drinking Game!

This game is tailored for the stage left brass (trumpets, bones, tuba), so edits must be made for the other sections if you want to play along.  My comments are in italics.



+ Take a shot every time you count through a long rest, inhale to play a line, and are cut off by the conductor.

+ If you play beyond a cutoff, one sip per bar.
If it's been a slow rehearsal, you can do one sip per bar of the last person in the orchestra to stop

+ Take a shot if the conductor asks to hear winds and brass, but the only ones playing at that section are winds and horns.

+ Take a sip if offbeats end up slipping to the onbeat behind them

+ Take a shot if offbeats push to the onbeat in front of them

+ If your conductor has a favourite word for rehearsal marks, take a sip for each time you hear it.
Let's take it at M for Mozart. Wait... no, N for Nielsen.

+ Of course, take a sip every time you're told brass is too loud

+ Got someone famous for being super loud?  Like, a lead trumpet or bone with an enormous ego and volume?  Finish your drink if they're told to play louder.
Inspired by our principal tuba, who can... well... PLAY the TUBA.

 + One sip per late string/woodwind player to the rehearsal. A shot for a late brasser/percussionist... HOW DARE THEY.

+ Take a shot for a violin line that goes so high, it becomes less of a pitch and more of a creak.

+ Take a shot if someone is audibly eating during rehearsal.

+ Anyone who has technical issues, like sticking valves, has to take a sip
Inspired by a trombonist who was missing their water key... like actually, the hole is there, but the key is not, so he has a cloth perpetually tied around it.

+ Take a sip every time three or more horns look at the rest of the brass section funny.

+ Finish your drink if the room goes silent.
HAH. Good luck.

+ If you've got a potty-mouth in the group, sip per swear word.
Looking at you, lead trombone.

+ Take a sip per string player doodling while instructions are being given.
I wonder if they think they're too quiet to be noticed?


+ And finally, one sip per second before anyone can answer the world-famous question: who has the melody right now?